I have never been a firm believer of using the new year as a crutch to start anew. I can't stand that shit! New Year's Eve was spent looking at Facebook statuses after Facebook statuses with people saying that they can't wait for the new year to start because all the shit from 2011 will be over or how suddenly life will get better than what 2011 brought them... What? Really? Awesome!!! I didn't realize that when the clock struck 12 everything was going to magically change!!! Fan-fucking-tastic! This is incredibly invigorating... I need that. And you know what? Let me tell you something that is super. When it became midnight, I felt the magic. I sensed this whirlwind of specialness that was sweeping around. I can't really explain the feeling, but I felt it. Trust me, it was there. I felt it!
Yeah... I lied... My bad guys... It was the alcohol talking again...
If shit happens in your life and you feel drastic change is needed. Don't wait till the new year. Or if the new year is suddenly going to make life better, that's not going to happen. That shit is all on you. Alright, got that out of the way. Moving on to other subject matters...
It's been a while my friends. Since our last meeting, I was procrastinating a research paper. I wrote a blog instead. Don't worry, I finished the paper, passed it in and got a good grade, etc.. Christmas was a blast (not going to bore you with my 4 broken home Christmases). New Years was also a blast. Went to a show in Boston and rocked out with some pals. It was eventful. I met a girl at the rock show and now I am in love... (didn't happen, but it might make a good story to tell the grandchildren one day...)
Let's get back to Christmas so I can bitch about that for a half second or so. Christmas is my favorite holiday. I love seeing my family. I love getting presents because I'm still a greedy child like that. I love seeing everyone's face when they open presents. I love the whole spirit of things. Now, the last 5 years I've been working in retail and so the magic is kind of lost there. But I know, every year, I will find a way to have that Christmas magic. Out of anyone in my family, my mother is always there to really heighten the excitement. My mother went as far as downloading a Santa Tracker app. I'm telling ya, this woman is devoted to her Christmas joy. She goes so crazy. She never cares about her own presents she has received because she's more interested in her children's expression on their faces when they open up something. I'm pretty certain my mother saves me from the horrors of what Christmas could be. I mean, don't get me wrong, my father does some pretty cool things come Christmas, but it's always a sure lock when I see my mothers face... End Mama's Boy Christmas Suck-Up rant (I do it because my birthday is 12 days after Christmas and I need to ensure I have good birthday presents).
What I hate about Christmas are all the naysayers. Let's be straight-fucking-forward, if you don't like Christmas, you lock yourself and the dumb fucking mouth of yours in your room and don't show your face. I don't want to see rants on how Christmas is shitty. Not my fault you have a shitty life or you hate your family. Do something about it. Either move out, find a friend, or try to start your own tradition. I don't like hearing about your awfulness, because I'm more likely to not give two fucking shits.
Second: I love traditions. I love hearing about traditions. DO NOT implicate your traditions on me. DO NOT tell me how I should operate on Christmas. And for the love of God and Jesus Christ our Savior, DO NOT tell me when to take down my fucking Christmas decorations. I was born and raised with the idea that Christmas ran from the day after Thanksgiving till January 7th. I hate hearing people say how they hurry up and take that shit down as soon as possible and everyone else should the same. Oh, I'm fucking sorry, I missed the fucking memo when we had to rush right through the fucking holidays. Remind me next year. I still might not give a shit, but just remind me. I FUCKING LOVE CHRISTMAS AND THAT'S THAT! BAM!
I also hate atheists on Christmas. Listen, I'm the last person to tell you God exists. In fact, I could give two shits about your spiritual beliefs, if applicable. So, I do expect you to do the same. Thanks.
I don't care what religion you are. Christmas is my holiday. Do what ever the fuck you want on yours. Don't interrupt me on mine. Oh yeah, majority rules. Sorry, not everyone is what ever religion you are. America was founded by Christians... So, I guess that gives us the right to play Christmas music on the radio. America is also the land of opportunity, instead of wasting welfare money, I suggest you start a radio station to play your holiday music. That tip won't cost anything. Also, I can't give you an exact number of how many radio stations there are out there, but really, that complaint is really getting old. Change the fucking channel you numb nut.
I have a birthday coming up. It's actually on Friday, January the Sixth of the year Two Thousand and Twelve. Basically, I wanted to let the world know that. There, it's out in the open. I'm very egotistical on my birthday. I know, how can I be anymore egotistical, you ask. It's possible. I let a lot of things slide on a daily basis. I expect the red carpets, the dancing ladies and all that other shit. Otherwise, I'm going to a casino and gamble all my college funds away... Maybe, I'll find a hooker, fall in love and then get married. Maybe, I just decide to get a fucking massage. Who knows what will happen while I am at Foxwoods (the wonder of it all). So who wants to hang out?
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